


I'm Done

by paintingtheworldgray



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drugs, Harry does drug, I hate tagging, I suck at this, Louis leaves, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Rehab, Rehabilitation, They are in the band, angst sorta, is there a course on how to do this properly?, kinda an au, maybe not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-21
Updated: 2013-02-21
Packaged: 2017-11-30 00:51:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/693479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paintingtheworldgray/pseuds/paintingtheworldgray
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life is not always as it seems, sometimes life isn’t even that enjoyable, you just have to go with the flow.</p><p>Or the one where Harry has a drug addiction and Louis leaves Harry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Done

**Author's Note:**

> This is a work of my imagination. :P

Louis was angry as he threw all of his clothes and possession into boxes, making sure he didn’t take anything that was Harry’s or had Harry’s picture or name on it. Louis was done with all of Harry’s shit and lies, he was tried of being lied too and tired of being alone all the time. Harry was out, like he always was these days, so he had no clue that Louis was packing up and leaving. He also, probably has no clue that Louis had bought out his contract with management and quit the band. Louis was done with everything that once involved his boyfriend, by the time Harry stumbles home later that night, Louis will be long gone and in hiding. Louis never thought about leaving Harry before, Louis loved Harry so much but when Louis found Harry’s stash of cocaine and heroine. Louis was done. Louis knew as he held both of the substances in hand that Harry had been lying to him, they were the reason during their love making that Harry would be rough and distant, suddenly everything made sense. Harry had started doing drugs, being distant with Louis; it was like the missing puzzle pieces had been found. Louis was done. Louis was never okay with drugs, it was adamant about not doing them, expect for weed though. Harry knew this. Harry agreed with Louis or maybe, he was lying to Louis even back then, how was Louis to know? That was why Louis was leaving, a week after he found Harry’s stash, he was finally leaving. He gave Harry chances to tell him, chances to ask for help, chances to remind Louis of the boy he had fallen in love with but that boy was long gone. Dead. In Louis’s eyes, Harry was dead and gone, never to be talked about, a taboo subject. Once Louis’s things were all packed, he called the moving company that was there in no time, taking all his boxes done to their truck. Louis was renting a place in Manchester, two hundred miles away from his memories with Harry and a place, where Louis could think of his next step from here. Louis shut the door after the last of his things were removed from the flat he shared with Harry, he locked the door slowly and slid his key under the door. He took out his cell phones, his work one and his personal one, placing both of them on the floor, before he jumped on both of them. Breaking them into a million pieces, crushing the last way for the boys and Harry to connect him, Louis was done. Louis was no longer a member of One Direction. He was no longer Harry Styles’ boyfriend. He was just Louis Tomlinson, a broken shell of what he once was, thanks to the person; he cared the most about in the world. Louis turned away from the door that was once, the entrance into his home and left, going to his Porsche and driving to his new home.

It was ten o’clock when Harry decided it was time for him to leave the party he was currently at and head home, back to Louis. His Louis. When Harry arrived home, the first thing he noticed in his drugged stated, was how funny it was that someone had broken their phone outside of his door. Harry unlooked the door and didn’t take notice of the key that he stepped on. He didn’t notice that all of Louis’ family’s pictures were no longer on the wall of the entry way nor did he notice that Louis’ bedroom was empty. It wasn’t odd for Louis not to be in his bedroom, they had been sharing Harry bedroom since they got together, Louis used his room to keep his abundance of clothes. What made Harry stop and question things was the fact Louis was not in Harry’s bed, Louis was not on the couch or in any of the bathrooms. Louis wasn’t in the kitchen, so the last place to check was Louis’s on bedroom. Harry slowly opened the door and took in the empty room: there was no bed, the closet was complete barren of clothes, except for ones that belonged to Harry himself; all the photos were off the wall, except for ones that Harry was in; the dresser was empty; the desk was empty; there was nothing in this room. Harry was high, unbelievably high but he knew that something was up, he was not laughing. No. He was frowning, trying to figure out what was up, where was Louis? Why was Louis’s room empty? Was everything he owned dirty so he took it get cleaned? Did Puff the Magic Dragon steal it? Harry was unsure; he didn’t know what he was supposed to do. He walked to where Louis’s bed once stood and curled up on the floor, hoping Louis would be home soon, he missed Louis.

Harry woke up and he was still alone, he was no longer high and that is when everything clicked together. Louis’s room was bare because he was no longer here, the smashed phones were Louis’, the key he had trampled over last night was Louis’s; Louis was gone. Harry started to panic, standing up and rushing into his room, looking for his phone, so he could call the boys or someone. He found his phone and saw that he had a missed call, from management. They told him that Louis had bought out his contract and quit, Louis was no longer a member of One Direction and they had an interview at five o’clock to announce this to the world. Harry sank on his bed, was this a hallucination, due to the drug he took last night? If it was, Harry was never going to take E again, this was terrible. Harry looked at his bed side table and his heart stopped, right next to his lamp was his cocaine and heroine, along with a note. A note that was short but made a point to break Harry’s heart, a note that made Harry start crying as he stared at it, the only thing Louis left behind. 

‘I’m done, you twat. Have a nice life with your drugs. –Louis  
P.S. Obviously we are broken up, just in case you were too high to understand that.’

‘Five years after he quit One Direction, Louis Tomlinson was spotted in Manchester with a handsome man and an adorable little girl. An inside source states that the man is Louis’ boyfriend and the child is theirs, they had decided after a year of serious dating to have a baby together. Louis is claimed to never have been happier, his boyfriend has a stable job and takes care of Louis.’ Louis smiled and even laughed at the magazine, they printed any kind of stories didn’t they? Louis was not dating anyone, the man is his roommate and the baby is the roommate’s baby that Louis babysits. Louis refused to date anymore; Harry had ruined that for him as well as everything else for Louis. Mia cooed from where she was laying on the floor, playing with a stuffed rabbit Louis had bought for her, Mia was the roommate’s daughter. After leaving by himself for a year, Louis was tired of being alone, so he put up an ad. George called Louis almost instantly and explained his problem. George had been living with Mia’s mother (who was his college sweetheart), when he found her having sex with not one, but two other men while their daughter was asleep in the next room. George wanted to leave but couldn’t do so until he found a place for both himself and Mia, Louis felt for the man, so a couple days later. Louis was no longer lonely, he always had Mia with him and George did treat Louis great, he was Louis’s best friend. At three o’clock, Louis decided to take the three year old out and go to the record shop, Mia was in love with music as much as Louis was. After putting on the little girl’s socks and shoes, they were on their way out of their flat, Mia walking along side Louis and holding tightly to his hand. Just a block from their flat, Louis got the shock of his life, all four current members of One Directions were talking to Ms. Jones (she owned the flower shop that Louis helped out at every once and while for pocket money). Mia squealed happily at the sight of Ms. Jones, who always had candy to give the already hyper three year old, who was now dragging Louis to the florist. “I’m sorry, gents but I am not going to tell you where Louis lives, it’s not my…Mia!” Ms. Jones reached into her apron and pulled out a handful of sweets, putting them in the pudgy hands of Mia, who thanks Ms. Jones repeatedly. Mia unwrapped a piece of candy and put into her mouth before she gave Louis the rest for safe keepings, not wanting to drop it on the sidewalk somewhere (that has happened before and she cried forever, until Louis bought her a bag full of candy). “Louis, these men here were looking for you, I wasn’t about to tell them where you lived but since you are here now…” I looked at the members of One Direction, who had stayed together despite Louis’ leaving. All that talk about how they were not One Direction if they weren’t all together, was just another lie to Louis, another reason why he was not happy to see them one bit. They were all staring at me, their eyes wide as if they saw a ghost, as if they didn’t expect to find me at all.

“So, it was true then, the article? You live in Manchester…with some guy and a child?” It was Harry, who spoke, his pupils blown a tell tale sign he was high. “You have a child with some random bloke? What the fu-freak?” 

“Mia is not mine nor is George my boyfriend, which is not any of your business. George is my roommate and Mia is daughter, I am just her babysitter most of the time and George is my best friend.” Louis glared at One Direction, hoping that his hatred for them was able to be seen in his eyes because Louis was mad and held strong feelings of distaste for every one of them. “You know what, I am done, Mia and I were heading somewhere, so excuse us.” Louis brushed past them and started down the street again, Mia still holding his hand as she always did, her other hand waving goodbye to the boys and Ms. Jones. Seeing them only reminded Louis of one thing, he was done. Louis was done with them but most of all, he was done with Harry. Harry was still on drugs, still doing them, knowing that Louis had left him for that reason. 

Harry was pissed, maybe it was the drugs that were flowing through his veins or maybe, it was the look Louis had given him. That look of utter disgust, that look that said Louis had never wanted to see him again. Maybe, it was the fact that Louis had called that George fellow his best friend, when that was Harry’s job. Harry was Louis’s best friend, Harry was supposed to be Louis’s boyfriend, people were supposed to think that Harry and Louis were having a child together: not Louis and George. This was not right. This trip to Manchester was supposed to talk Louis into coming home, into being with Harry again or to get him in One Direction again. Not find out how much he enjoys his new fucking life. Harry had gone down hill since Louis left; his drug addiction had hit a new high (literately): heroine; cocaine; Ecstasy; Oxycotton; Meth; Vicidine and LSD. He mixes and matches, he takes too much sometimes and has to sleep it off, he has been drinking a lot more. Harry knew that after Louis left him for the drugs, he should have stopped, he really knew that. But when you are hurting so much, what else is there to turn to? The other boys don’t know why Louis left, Harry never told them, if he would have; what would they have said? Harry knew doing drugs was wrong but when it made you feel so good, after feeling like shit, how could you resist? Sure, they made him lose the love of his life but they made Harry not feel that lose, they just made him feel angry at Louis for leaving. “Louis, wait, we just wanted to talk to us. Can you just give us a few minutes of your time, please?” It was Liam that spoke and it was hard for Louis to not want to give into Liam, Louis’s steps faltered. 

“I promised to take Mia to the record store, so we are going to go but…George gets off work at four, meet me in front of the flower shop at four thirty, I’ll talk to you then.” The record store was a few blocks from the flat and was owned by a nice old woman, it was Louis’s favourite place in the world. All the old smelling records and how she had many different types of records, Louis was buying a Beatles record today and Mia talked him (whined and pouted) into buying a Monkees album. Louis doesn’t know why he agreed to meet up with One Direction, he didn’t honestly want to talk to them but it was Liam. Saying no to Liam is like kicking a puppy, something Louis does not do, he does not kick puppies. Louis was done with One Direction. He was done with Harry. Louis had been done with them for five years. Five years he had lived a happy life, not worry about Harry or anything else, except for Mia that is. Louis wasn’t sure what One Direction wanted with him but he guesses he’ll learn when he meets back up with him. George got home at four twenty; bring Nandos takeout with him and a rose for Louis: even thought they were not dating, George still liked to do nice things for Louis. Louis held the rose in his hand, kissing George on the cheek, before telling him he had somewhere to be. George responded with he would put Louis’s food in the refrigerator to eat when he gets back and Louis left, rose still in his hand as he walked to the florist. The four boys were in a group, talking amongst themselves as Louis walks up to them, a sad smile on his face. “Where do you want to talk? There is a park about a block from here, no one is there at this time, I promise.” They nodded their heads and followed Louis, all of them sitting at a picnic table but Louis, who decided to stand. “Why are you here?”

“We want to know why you left, Louis and not the bull shit reason that you gave management.” Zayn sounded angry as he spoke, making Harry smile happily; he wasn’t the only one mad at Louis then. 

“Harry didn’t tell you? He didn’t allow you to see the note I left behind or the little presents I found a week before I left? He told you nothing?” This was not turning out how Harry had hoped, Louis was supposed to say he missed them and that he would be coming back, not all this. “Harry is doing drugs, heavy drugs and had taken up lying to me. Not only that but he started to get rough with me, slapping me around, leaving bruises and just not caring. I could date a drug addict, I could live with a drug addict, I couldn’t be in a band with a drug addict…I was done. I gave him a week, a week of me hinting at his drug use, a week of me talking about heroine and cocaine, a bloody week to allow him to be nicer to me while we fucked.” Harry gasped, Harry never considered what he and Louis did to be fucking, it was love making in the purest form. To hear Louis say it, it hurt Harry, on a level he wasn’t sure he could feel anymore.

“Harry doesn’t do drugs, Louis, we would know!” Zayn shouted at Louis, making Harry feel bad that someone was treating his Louis that way.

“Yeah, well, he is high now. Have you ever asked him, just flat out, asked Harry? Harry, are you taking drugs? Are you high right now?” Louis was looking at Harry; looking straight into the jade orbs he was once in love with, waiting for the younger man to answer his question. Louis already knew the answer, Harry knew what he was going to answer, they were just having an awkward pause.

“I…Yes, to both questions but it’s not a problem, it was never a problem.” Harry pleaded, looking at Louis, trying to convince Louis that he should come back to Harry. Harry wasn’t a drug addict, he just liked doing a lot of them but that doesn’t mean he has a problem, right? No, it was not a problem; Louis had no right to insinuate it. Sure, Harry took a lot of drugs but that was not…is not…never was an issue. “It’s not like I am a drug addict, I just like them, it doesn’t mean I have a problem.” Niall, Liam and Zayn were staring at Harry, Louis was just looking sadly at Harry but in Harry’s mind, at least Louis was looking at him. 

“H-how…What kinds do you take?” It was a silly question to Harry but he answered anyway, listing all of the drugs he has taken since being in One Direction. He was quite proud of his long list; it impressed a lot of people at the clubs/parties he usually goes to. Maybe, Louis will like the list of drugs Harry does. Maybe, it’ll bring Louis back to Harry. Maybe, just maybe, Louis isn’t as done as he thought he was. 

“See, I bloody told you all. You should do something about him before he overdoses or something; you don’t want that as your band’s image.” The boys started to argue about sending Harry to rehab and Louis felt like he really shouldn’t be here, this wasn’t his problem anymore. Louis was done. He was finished with all this shit and he made it known, by slamming his hands down loudly on the picnic table. “If you are all done with your arguing, I would like to head back home and it the food George brought back to me. I am sorry that you had to find out about Harry this way, he should have told you but it’s not my problem anymore. I am done.” Louis grabbed his rose and left, quickly as he could. When he got back to his flat, all he wanted was to forget, why didn’t it feel like he was done?

Liam, Niall and Zayn force Harry into rehab, though the curly haired bloke was not too happy about it but he went without a struggle. Harry decided that rehab might not be bad, he is not happy about going cold turkey but he didn’t want to have to leave the band. Harry’s room was bare, the bed had scratchy brown sheets and the desk had rounded corners. The only bathrooms were open, a community bathroom of a sort, none of the doors lock. Liam, Niall and Zayn dropped Harry off, signed him in and left, not saying a word to him at all. Harry knew they were upset because he never told them about the drugs, but after the way Louis reacted, could you blame Harry?

Apparently, you could blame, Harry. No one has called to check on him. No one has written him a letter. No one has written him an email. No one has contacted him. Harry didn’t feel well about this. He didn’t like it at all. He had talked about this in his therapy sessions; he’s talked about a lot in those sessions. Harry talked about how he feels, how he felt and how he wants to feel in the future. He talks about Louis: his love for Louis; about pushing Louis away; about Louis’s hatred for drugs; about the rough sex and why he thinks he had rough sex. Harry talks about what he wanted to do once he got out of rehab and he only had one answer for it, he wasn’t going to go back to the band. Harry couldn’t. The fame, the media, the pressure, it had all added onto Harry. He was like he was forced into it. People had rationalized as they handed Harry the drugs, that lots of famous people use drugs or do drugs or have done drugs. They made him feel like it was normal, they allowed him to think that way and they never corrected him one bit. Harry talks about the first time he had done drugs, the serious drugs, in therapy lots of times. He speaks of the cocaine, how it was in pretty little lines on a bathroom countertop at Nick Grimshaw’s flat. How he had ignored it at first, walked backwards at of the bathroom, not wanting to touch the stuff. It wasn’t until Nick, one of Harry’s best friends, pulled him back into the bathroom. It wasn’t until Nick had started to tell the lies, tell Harry it was okay. It wasn’t until Nick shoves Harry’s face against the countertop, telling him it would make him feel good, better than sex. Nick had his hand on Harry’s throat and the only way for Harry to breathe was through his nose, which caused the cocaine to be inhaled. It wasn’t a pleasant memory but it was how it happened. Harry, after feeling the effects of the cocaine, had to agree with Nick. It was a great feeling. He didn’t care about the fans. He didn’t care about the haters. He didn’t care about the fact he was forced to stay in the closet and lie about his boyfriend. The therapist, who listened to Harry day in and day out, thought Harry, had made improvements. The fact that Harry could openly talk about everything was remarkable as the therapist put it, Harry just wanted his family. He wanted his mum, his stepfather and his sister. He didn’t care about the band or his so called brothers or his ex-boyfriend. Harry was happy to be healthy, was happy to be done with rehab in a week, after spending a year inside the institution. Usually, rehab was only ninety days but seeing as Harry was a celebrity and had more than one drug he was using, they extended the time (Harry had asked them too, he didn’t want to leave, thinking he could do this on his own).

After his last therapy of the day, Harry walked to his room, nodding to some of the people he had come to know. Once in his room, Harry made a phone call, told his management and talked to them. Told them that he would not be making it back to the band, he was sorry but he couldn’t, it was not good for his health. They said they knew this was coming, tried to prepare the other lads for this but none of them listened, they were so sure Harry was to come back. Harry apologized again, he never meant to disappoint people, only make himself happier. He hung up the phone and lay in his bed, in a week’s time, he will be moving out of his flat in London with the help of sober companion. The companion was only there to help Harry through finding his stashes, which were still hidden all over the flat, it was to help Harry stay sober and he knew this. He was moving to Bristol, to go to college and get a degree to teach music or choir. He wanted a fresh start and that is what Harry was going to get because…well…He was done with drugs. Harry was done with his old life.

Harry still loved Louis. Louis still loved Harry. They meet up, by chance in Manchester years later, maybe years later. Louis still lived with George and Mia; he was still not dating George nor was he dating anyone else, Louis still couldn’t get over Harry. Harry finished school and became a teacher, teaching many students, who were excited to be taught by ‘The Harry Styles’. Harry taught music theory class, show choir, regular choir and the guitar class. He was happy, he was drug free, he didn’t even drink alcohol anymore. Harry didn’t date though. Never thought of it to be honest. He didn’t want to hurt someone else, didn’t want to think about all the terrible things he did to Louis, he didn’t want to remember or…that was until they bumped into each other, literally. Harry was read some sheet music, eating an apple and walking all at the same time. Louis had earphones in, was dancing and carrying a bag of groceries from Tesco. They collide, it was not magically, it just pissed them both off. Louis’s bag broke, spilling all over the concrete, Harry’s apple rolled into the road way and got run over. They cursed at the same time, which caused them to look at each other, to recognize each other. It was awkward at first, weird even, because they never thought to see each other again. Harry had even forgotten that Louis lived in Manchester, it was part of his drug life, a moment he doesn’t look back to often. They eventually soften to each other, had a decent conversation, before Louis remembers he had to get home before Mia. They said their goodbyes, both leaving and heading to their own homes, where they think about each other. They were not going to become friends again. They were not going to be boyfriends. They could not be together. Not just for Harry’s sobriety but for Louis’s sanity. Seeing Harry it was one thing but having a relationship with someone, who made sex terrible for Louis, it was not something he wanted. Louis was done. Harry was done. They were both done and that was okay, because they were both alive and happy, something they had both wanted for the other for a long time.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are always welcomed! :) <3


End file.
